Making Your Fertility Treatment Plan: Taking Control of Your Fertility

Take a moment to think about your married life before you thought you had a fertility problem. You were happy, optimistic, and looking forward to the day when together you'd create a new life—when you would begin your family. For one reason or another you may have delayed starting one. You may have saved for a house, finished college, taken your dream vacation, or begun a career. You wanted the best possible start for your marriage before you settled down to enjoy having a family.

Then the roof caved in.

"I remember being surrounded by X rays. My mind wandered back to the day Mitch and I decided to wait to have a baby. I had wanted to start my public relations career. We had been able to buy our dream house where our babies could play in their own backyard. As the doctor pointed to the shadowy pictures, he explained how my blocked tubes were preventing my pregnancy. I don't remember much more after that—only my pain and disappointment."

Jeanne is only one of my patients who, late in her reproductive life, discovered a fertility problem. Fortunately, soon after I repaired her damaged fallopian tubes with microsurgery, Jeanne and Mitch conceived and had a beautiful, normal baby boy. She's now pregnant with her second baby.

In my practice I have found that many couples' problems aren't resolved as quickly as Jeanne's. Their diagnosis may be more elusive, their treatment more complex. For example, by the time Michael and Shelley T. came to me, they both were discouraged and worried. For two years they had been trying unsuccessfully to conceive. Their physician had already completed a fertility workup, performed painful tubal surgery, and prescribed powerful fertility drugs—all to no avail. When I first saw them, their quality of life had deteriorated to an unfortunate low.

The advice that I gave Michael and Shelley worked for them and it will work for you, too. I'm going to show you how you can permanently improve your quality of life, even when faced with overwhelming odds. And I'm certain that as a couple you will grow closer and stronger from your efforts.

In this book you will become acquainted with four couples who took charge of their fertility problems and found their miracle babies:

Michael and Shelley T.
When her doctor recommended a hysterectomy, Shelley T. panicked. She was afraid that Michael would divorce her because she thought that having a baby was the most important thing a wife could do for him.

By the time I saw them, all Michael could do was grumble about mounting medical bills; he thought all fertility specialists were "rip-off artists." Shelley was hurt, angry, and distrustful. She'd put her life and her career on hold, believing that "I'd get pregnant any day." The only reason she had requested a second opinion was the encouragement she received from the RESOLVE infertility support group when they heard that Michael had never had a semen analysis.

By blindly accepting one test and treatment after another, this couple had forfeited their responsibility and control for their fertility. Michael's lack of interest and support not only added to Shelley's difficulties but, as it turned out, also prevented an accurate diagnosis—he had no sperm in his semen. She had undergone years of expensive treatment, but never had a chance for pregnancy. Their situation illustrates what can happen when you have unrealistic expectations and pursue no clear-cut treatment plan.

In this book you will see how Shelley and Michael took control of their fertility treatment and their lives. And you will find out how they got their miracle baby, Tommy.

Bryan and Debbie W.
Debbie believed that until she had a baby she would not be a complete woman. When spontaneous bleeding disrupted her third month of pregnancy, Debbie became desperate: "I've already lost two babies. If I lose another, I don't know what I'll do." Unfortunately after her spontaneous abortion began, there wasn't much I could do to save their baby. But I could do a lot to keep her from losing their next baby.

In later chapters you will learn how Debbie and Bryan coped with their loss and grief. And you'll learn how Debbie's exposure to DES, while she was still in her mother's womb, destined her for repeated abortions.

When I secured Debbie's incompetent cervix during her next pregnancy, she was able to have a beautiful blue-eyed baby girl.

Steven and Kathy S.
Kathy's periods probably stopped because of the excess running she did to prepare for amateur competition. Running, however, was very important to Kathy's self-image. She wanted to maintain her life-style and have a baby, too.

"Before we commit to a bunch of tests, we want to know what to expect," Kathy S. said on their first visit. "We want a baby, but we have our lives to live, too." Kathy and Steven wanted to understand the big picture: what tests I'd recommend, what the results would mean, how long it would take, what the odds were that she'd conceive, and what it would cost.

After the initial workup, they were surprised to find that Steven had a poor semen analysis. I suspected that his varicocoele (varicose vein in the scrotum) might also be impairing their ability to have a child.

As their story unfolds, you will find out how this couple's take-control attitude and their desire for having a fertility treatment plan led them on a direct path toward their goal. You will also find out how their persistence and hard work during ovulation induction treatment eventually paid off.

Richard and Margaret B.
Since graduating from college, Margaret had pursued a successful career. When she was thirty-one she and Richard decided that she should stop taking the Pill so they could begin their family. But nothing happened.

Concerned about their progress, a year later Margaret came to me requesting a fertility evaluation. Although her physical examination revealed no obvious fertility problem, I was concerned about possible complications from the ruptured appendix she had suffered at twenty-three. The tubal X ray confirmed my suspicions: it revealed that both of Margaret's tubes were blocked.

When I received the results of Richard's semen analysis, I became concerned that his consistent use of marijuana could be impairing his fertility potential.

In this book you will find out how even though microsurgery restored Margaret's fallopian tubes, the surgery did not make her fertile. And you will learn how the miracle of in vitro fertilization gave them the son they wanted so much.

Seeing how each of these couples managed their fertility problems will provide you with insight into the many options you have in coping with fertility and its treatment.

The steps I recommend for planning a fertility treatment program make common sense and are easy to follow. As you learn more about your fertility and about your treatment, you will become less tense and anxious. You will be able to formulate a short-term plan and set long-term goals as well.

Together with your physician, you will be able to take an active part in your individualized diagnosis and treatment.

Continued